My partner pointed out to me yesterday that I always say “if I could lose this weight …” instead of “when I lose this weight.”

It’s an important distinction. I’ve always said “if” because I was pretty sure I’d fail miserably. But now I think I’m going to say “when,” even though I’m still not convinced that I won’t fail. I’m going to do it because I think it’s probably more motivating than expecting failure.

There’s a ray of hope in all of this. I went to visit my family last weekend, and stuck to the whole program. Nary a chocolate doughnut hole or glass of wine made it to my capacious maw. Instead, I stuck to the program and actually lost two pounds this week. I never, ever thought I could do that. So maybe now when I say “when,” it actually means something.